A Fun-Filled Summer

During the summer, it's so hard for us to do the things we normally do in the winter months. For example, during the winter months, I love to sew, we watch TV programs, we bake, etc. In the summer, we're either riding our bikes, going to the park, off to the lake, camping, etc. We never have time to do the inside activities that we enjoy so much during the winter. In fact, updating our blog is difficult in the summer. But, here I am....ready to provide the update. The picture of the kids above is them at Chuck E. Cheese...shooting baskets.

We've have a great summer so far. We spent a long weekend at Lake McConaughy where we did some jet skiing and tried out of camper. The kids loved swimming on the sandy beaches. We went to Chuck E. Cheese for Brock's 4th birthday and then went roller skating for Braeden's 5th birthday. We've rode our bikes to the park almost every night and the kids have gotten the chance to play with several other kids from our neighborhood.

We've been busy with soccer, gymnastics, swim lessons and t-ball. And only two of the kids are in activities now...imagine what it will be when Braxden gets old enough to participate in activities!!!

In two weeks, we leave for Texas for vacation. We're going to tour the Texas Amusement Parks which will be loads of fun. And when we return, not only will Braeden be starting school...but Eric will be starting a new job where he will have his evenings and weekends off!

Well, I'm off to experience more summer fun...

A Life Without Worry Doesn’t Exist

Watching what has happened at Virginia Tech over the last few days has upset me considerably. On Monday, after listening to the reports of the massacre for several hours, I quietly put Brock to bed. Braxden was already sleeping and Braeden was in her room reading books. I leaned down to give him a kiss on his forehead just as I do every night, and like a bullet piercing through my heart, I realize that there will never again in my life be a time where I do not carry worry.

I began thinking how easy it would be for some crazed person to step foot in the kids’ pre-school class and simply unload, or how effortlessly a gun-carrying psychopath could march into Braeden’s gymnastics class and start shooting. Braeden’s starts kindergarten in a few months and anyone can walk in and out of those buildings. Just writing about it now scares me to no end.

I once heard a quote that talked about how parents feel about their children. I’ll probably get this wrong and I have no clue who said it, but it was something like, “Having children is forever deciding to allow your heart to exist outside of your body.” After watching Monday’s events, how can I, or how can any mother, protect my children from these events? How do I teach them to be safe if some mad-man steps in front of them with a 9 mm?

Those students and professors at Virginia Tech woke up Monday morning and went to class as they did every other morning. They didn’t know that in only a few short hours, they’d be fighting to stay alive…and some, as it sounds, didn’t even have the opportunity to fight before their end. And like them, our family has our routine where every morning, we wake up and go to school and go to work, and we have no way of knowing if we’ll see each other again at dinner.

Virginia Tech has once again reminded me, like some many other events where people are hurt and killed, that I cannot protect my babies from the world. I can only control those things of which I have control…which, needless to say, is very little. My primary defense is to simply pray for their safety each and every day and offer thanks that I am so blessed to have the pleasure of putting them in bed at night.

Coping without Marilyn

We lost my mother-in-law on March 17th and it has been difficult adjusting to life without her. A prime example was last weekend...Easter weekend.

Marilyn was the backbone of my husband's family. Every event she coordinated. Every minute detail of his sister and his brothers' lives were captured in her daily conversations she had with her children. We're quickly learning that without her, we don't really know each other at all.

At Easter, in years past, Marilyn would plan a meal and everyone would eventually, sometime through out the day, stop over so that she could see the all the kids. If she didn't feel like cooking, we'd all get together and have brunch after church. This year, everything was different.

Of course Stew is in no position to be planning family events. The man just lost his wife and he's trying to learn how to function on his own right now. One of his brothers invited everyone to have brunch, but some brothers went in the morning, some brothers went after church and even some brothers didn't show up at all.

We tried to organized an Easter Egg Hunt at Stew's house, and some brothers didn't even know about it.

All of the disorganization just adds to the confusion of defining life without her. A friend simply told me, "Well, it's time for you girls to step up to the plate," meaning that we (the daughters-in-law) needed to assume Marilyn's position with these events. I guess she's right, but it doesn't feel right in my heart.

I guess we just miss her....I wonder what Thanksgiving and Christmas is going to look like.

Here's a picture of the kids on Easter morning:

Pic of the little ones

I wanted to share a picture of our little ones. This picture was taken on July 16, 2006 at Disneyland in Anahiem, California. We were patiently waiting for Cinderella.

The Bottomless Bag of Guilt

Before Braeden was born, I never felt guilty for doing things that I wanted to do. If I wanted to go out one night, I would. If I wanted do absolutely nothing...that's exactly what I did. Now that I'm a mom, I find it difficult to think of a moment where I haven't felt guilty.

This notion of always feeling guilt came up again last night. Here I am trying to do my nightly pilates. I certainly don't have time to go to a gym everyday with three kids, so I try and do what I can at home. Plus, the kids love to join in. Braeden and Brock were fighting like crazy. I just couldn't take the bickering anymore so instead of letting them do pilates too, they were sent to their rooms (big punishment as they're rooms have a tons of stuff for them to play with). So, I have them occupied. Little Braxden stayed with me in the living room as I'm doing my workout, and he refuses to stop crawling all over me. Here I am trying to do leg lifts with a 20 pound baby using my knee leaning stool. After several attempts to have him lean on something else, I finally cracked and picked him up and put him on the other side of the room. I then resumed my leg lifts.

How dumb is this...he was simply trying to be involved and be close to me and Braeden and Brock were simply trying to participate in pilates with me. And here I am, trying to find peace and do my own thing when I should be playing with them.

No matter what I'm doing, I always tend to find ways to feel guilty about it. No one ever told me that with motherhood came with a bottomless bag of guilt.

Leaving Stress at the Door

I've always heard moms say that balancing work and home is a struggle. For me, I definitely walk a tightrope. Working for me has never been a choice. I never imagined that I wouldn't work. I idolize those moms that get to stay home...how lucky are they!! While I would adore staying with my kids everyday, that dream is simply not a possibility. I've come to accept this fact and don't struggle with this aspect. I do, however, participate in a daily tug-of-war over work-related stress.

How do working moms leave their stress at the door and come home refreshed? There has been many times where I catch myself bringing these frustrations home. When I do notice that I'm doing this, I try very hard to stop, but it's not always that easy. Braeden is four now and I would have thought that I would have this figured out by now.

I'm certainly not the first mom to arrive at this dilemma. All I can do it hope to pick up a few tricks from the moms that I admire, and keep trying to not bring work home with me.

Welcome to my blog

Welcome to my blog. My husband and I had a blog as we were moving through the process on adopting our youngest son. Now that he's finally home, we wanted to start blogging about the situations that we encounter as we raise our three beautiful children.

We are the luckiest people in the world to have been blessed with such amazing kids! Braeden, our daughter, just turn four. Our oldest son, Brock, just turned three. And our little baby, Braxden, will be one in a few months.

We are just beginning to discover the challenges of raising three kids. And even though the are babies, they're already starting to team up against one another. For example, the other day, Brock and Braxden had Braeden pinned on the floor and both of them were pulling her hair. I told her that she needs to establish her authority over her two little brothers right now, and she can't let them team up on her.

But she and Braxden are a lot alike. The two of them are very low key where Brock is more demanding. Yet, Brock is the one who enjoys cuddling and hugs and kisses more so than the other two. It amazes me how their personalities are so different even though the three of them are so close in age and do everything together.

Anyhow, welcome to our adventure!